Tropical Storm Children

Preparing for a hurricane in my prior life consisted of buying junk food, beer, and planning a party with friends.  Now, with children, it feels like the opposite.  It is all about preparedness and figuring out how to keep the power on and the milk cold or frozen. I am banking on the fact that we will not be losing power but if we do I am banking on my in-laws generator powering our refrigerator.

Please Lord!

Today I had the kiddos partying with me 24-7 as J had a meeting until 11. I ran some errands this morning, played at a friends house until 12 and then came home and put L to sleep for her nap.  I layed down to nurse C for 2 hours just so I could shut my eyes for part of that.  She must have consumed 10 ounces.  Every time she started to wake up I would stick a boob in her mouth and she would settle back down to sleep.  Complete sleep deprivation on mommy’s part allowed for her to have a milk fest. Lucky C! When we woke up I took L to the grocery store to stock up on food and joined all of Miami. I’m pretty sure Broward and Monroe counties were all at my Publix too. When we came home J wanted to prepare the outside so I had both ladies to entertain.  We played puzzles, played hair, we drank tea and ate cupcakes, and we chased Pixie. I don’t even want to think about tomorrow when the storm actually blows through.  What are we going to do all day!!?

 C started to get fussy so I tried to put her back to sleep.  She is at the age when any noise around her causes her to rip off my boob and look around the room. It feels just fabulous.  I am trying to get L use to entertaining herself while I do this but so far she objects. Today I asked her to just watch Mary Poppins (the only movie she will watch) while I fed her sister and she looked like she would oblige me.  She false advertised.  5 minutes in and she is parked next to my glider staring at me talking about Pixie, aka “chi chi”, and C rips off. I beg her to be quiet.  This gives her free reign around the house.  I watch her through the French doors as she picks up my giant Tervis tumbler and proceeds to drink it.  I usually outlaw this behavior but since she knows I am unable to yell she continues to do it at her leisure.  I abandon worrying about this and proceed to C’s room to put her in her crib.  I hear footsteps.  Oh good it’s L and Pixie.  I put my finger to my mouth to make a “Shhh” sound.  L repeats it to me.  I proceed to lay the baby down and at the same time L squeals at Pixie and C pops up. Greaaaaat.   I pick her up and bounce.  We have been bouncing her on an exercise ball to put her to sleep since she was little and when it isn’t around I have to simulate it and give my quads a workout.  That is one way to exercise.  Actually that is my only way these days.  I bounce her back to sleep.  L and pixie are chasing eachother around the house at this point and I start to pray that they stay away for one more minute so I can lay her down.  Negative ghost rider, the party continues next to me with pixie growling at L as she tries to kick her. Awesome, C wakes up again.  I am about to get on my knees and beg God to help me get her to sleep and then the front door opens.  J is home.  It is a short lived reprieve.  He has an agenda.  I grab the baby ergo and deal with the fact that C is awake.  Too much to do to worry about this. 

J takes L in the pool while I start dinner and a bath.  A pest control guy shows up in the middle of all this to give us a quote on white fly, a fly that destroys your trees but never existed 10 years ago. Whatever.  Blue job.  I put L in the bathtub and play with her.  I decide I should probably bathe the other kid too but two in the tub is hard and C can’t sit up by herself so I have to half way get in to maintain her position.  Fun stuff.  Time to get out and get dressed.  Impossible to take two out at once so I drain some water and try and get C dressed quickly.  L jumps out and runs around the house wet and naked.  Knock yourself out.  20 minutes later I am in the kitchen trying to keep the natives happy with dinner as it gets dark and then…I hear a noise outside.  J has a chainsaw in his hand with the pest control guy and he is slicing through our hibiscus bush. What. Is. Going. On. Around. Here? I hit the patio door and flash him the death look.  Yes, the look that means business, and the look that causes arguments.  He waltzes in the door 10 minutes later and says he was just getting things done. Lovely, take a child.  Any child.

It’s bedtime. I made it through the day.  I can not imagine tomorrow. Wine in hand and a little cookie dough after dinner.  Nice.  I shut my eyes at 11.  Guess who pops up at 12…baby C, ready to party.  I am not going to continue my story because it starts to get ugly around here, but know that we survived the wannabe hurricane/tropical storm. The jury is still out if I will survive motherhood.  Ha ha.

“I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in Him I will trust”  Psalms 91:2


3 thoughts on “Tropical Storm Children

  1. Aw sweetie, isn’t that always the way? And doesn’t the Blue Team always seem to forget the only rule? I’ve tried to sum it up to mine the way they did in The Birdcage, with Robin Williams, when they’re trying to “un-gay” the decor of their Miami Beach apt. and they hang a larger-than-life crucifix on the wall – and Robin Williams says, “Don’t Add. Just Subtract.” This is a concept I’ve tried to get the hubster to commit to memory. Does it ADD to the Pink team’s work? Then DON’T DO IT! Does it SUBTRACT from the Pink team’s work – Then do it NOW, do it OFTEN, and don’t ask if I want you to do it – I DO!

    Hope you kept power. Hope the natives settled down. Hope you didn’t go crazy (we played a LOT of My Little Pony today, NOT as fun as when we were kids). Hugs!

  2. LOL! Great one Christine! Brought back a floor of memories when Noah was nursing and similar things happened with me- trying to stay quiet so Noah wouldn’t pop off, shooting Connor looks and going “shh!”, Connor following me into the bedroom as I’m laying Noah down and deciding to make a fire ruck siren sound, bouncing him back to sleep… so funny. Love this one!! 🙂 You’re a great Mom and humorous writer! And good luck with the storm! Hope it doesn’t hit you guys too bad.

  3. Could you be any funnier… Honestly you are getting me through the long nights, and days! And I hear you with the bouncing… Mine like it a particular way when I’m on my tippy toes, of course! I am on my way to getting calves like a line backers!

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